The Little Things...They're Actually Huge!

So, I was reading a bit more of my latest book, The Happiness Project (love it BTW...) and the author was going on about how all of these philosophy books say that the small things are the most important. Giving what she calls "small proofs of love" is critical.

Based on my previous relationship, I can definitely say the small things matter! They are really the foundation of all of our relationships. If we only do big things a few tiimes it doesn't add up to any major effect. However, if we do little things all the time, those add up. It's one of the reasons I'm not a huge fan of Valentine's Day, Sweetest Day, etc. If we appreciate your significant other and close loved ones every day then those days lose their meaning and need. Doesn't mean its not nice to get something, but I hate when that's the only time caring is shown. Now I'm not perfect! FAR from it! There are many times where I forget to thank someone or forget to call and check on someone if they are going through something important to them. I don't do it on purpose and usually beat myself up about it when I do finally remember, but I guess that's part of what this is all about. Trying to be better about. Doing the little things more often than I did in the past.

Last night I was getting ready for bed and Mike came up to bed. Now for those of you who know my husband well...know that he's ADHD and involved in fifty million things. On top of that, he doesn't need much sleep at all. Maybe 3-4 hours a night and he's good to go. Sometimes he needs more but rarely. And when he's working out, forget about it. I think he could take cat naps and be completely fine. However, the one sacred thing we have is bed time. No matter how fast both of us are running during the day, we always try to go to bed at the same time. This really hit me last night because while I was reading a few pages in my book, the author specifically mentioned that one of her friends suggested she and her husband always go to bed at the same time. She said nothing bad can happen when you do that. You will either talk, get extra sleep or have some fun hubby/wife time :) None of them are bad options. When I read that I smiled because we do that...the going to bed at the same time thing. This is even more important to me because I know Mike doesn't always sleep when he comes to bed. However, we love that time together. So, no matter how wide aware he is, he will come to bed with me about 98% of the time. There are a few times I specifically tell him to stay up because I can visibly see how wired he is and/or his work gets in the way...you get the idea. The point it is, that is one little thing he does for me everyday that sometimes is easily taken for granted. So, last night, I got into bed and thanked him for it. I told him that I know sometimes he will let me fall asleep and then get up and do something but that I appreciate he likes this time we spend together and he's willing to go against his bodies internal clock to spend it with me even if its just for me to fall asleep sometimes. He seemed really appreciative that I thanked him but more so that I noticed. I know he knows I appreciate but hearing out loud is different.

Yesterday my mom also heard I was in a crappy mood. While we may not talk everyday, we've always been there when we needed each other. Yesterday, she sent me this little facebook heart just to cheer me up. As silly as that sounds to some people, it made me smile...because although we don't live by each other anymore, we are still able to touch each other's lives even during the day when we are both busy. Just doing that, let me know she was thinking about me and loved me.

It's just those little things that add up. I truly believe it and am going to try and make sure I continue to do those little things even if they seem silly because in the end they are all that matters :) Have a fantastic day!